Watching Glass Shatter Page 14

  He jumped back in his seat and noticed a young kid with an eyebrow piercing and skull cap leaning against the car next to him. The kid signaled for him to roll down the window.

  Matt hesitated at first, then pressed the button and stopped the window after it left a six-inch gap.

  “You Matt?” The kid's enlarged pupils darted back and forth.

  Matt nodded, tapping his foot against the center console. “Yup.” As he looked the kid up and down, two key facts hit him. One, the kid was just a teenager. Two, he had a long piece of metal strapped to his forearm near where his fingers grasped the loop in his jeans. Matt contemplated pulling away faster than his favorite pitcher's speedball. What the hell am I doing?

  Sensing Matt's glare and tension, the kid shifted his weight and reached in his other pocket ensuring Matt saw the knife he'd been carrying. It wasn't just a metal strap. “I don't got all day, man. You bring the money?”

  Matt grabbed the bills he put in the cup holder. “Yeah, right here.” Damn, I'm gonna die in this car. “How old are you?” He bit his lower lip, chewing on a piece of skin to keep his teeth from chattering.

  “Does it matter to you how old I am, dude?”

  “Just curious, a bit young to do this kinda…” Matt thought back to when he was sixteen practicing football, analyzing stock reports, and playing video games.

  The kid leaned forward against the Jetta staring through the window gap. “What do you do for a living, Matt?” His knuckles tapped the car door. His stare stirred Matt's fears.

  Matt shifted toward the passenger seat and locked the door with his shaky fingers. “Why do you need to know?” Don't provoke him. He's got a knife.

  The kid reached through the six-inch gap and took the money from Matt's hands without even touching the window glass or door frame.

  Matt realized this was second nature to the kid. I can take him if he starts a brawl.

  “Exactly. I don't need to know what you do for a living. And you don't need to know how old I am. Thanks for the cash, Mattster.” He flipped the bottle he pulled from his pocket into the passenger seat and walked away. “Enjoy the meds, bro. You won't know what hit ya.”

  Matt closed his eyes and breathed out heavily. I need to get the hell out of here. He flung the car into reverse and sped out of the parking lot.

  Margaret drained the boiling water out of the pasta into the sink, the steam fogging the window above. “I brought a few bottles of chianti. It might go nicely with dinner. Shall I pour you a glass while we wait for Matthew to get home?” Olivia set the table searching for any shift in her daughter-in-law's body language.

  “No, not for me. I've had a bit of a headache all day, and red wine makes it worse. Pour yourself a glass, please. I keep the opener in the top drawer.”

  “Can I get you any Advil or Tylenol?”

  Margaret shook her head, the golden curls bouncing off her slender neck. “I'll ride it out, thanks. Did you see the pictures I posted online today? The girls were playing with Anastasia at the park. I got one with them all on the swing set.”

  “No, I don't have an Instagram account. I've been a bit busy the last few years.”

  Olivia was convinced Margaret was pregnant again. No wine. No medicine. Glowing.

  Margaret mixed sauce into the spaghetti and checked on the girls through the wall opening into the living room where they watched a puppet show.

  Olivia sampled the wine and pressed on. “Matthew is such a perfect father to the girls. I'm confident he'd be just as good with a son. It's a bit ironic I had five boys but only have granddaughters and no grandsons so far.” A vein in her temple pulsed when she said five boys, causing her to consider that Matt might be the one Ben referred to in his letter.

  Margaret dropped the slotted spoon onto the stovetop and opened her mouth to reply, but Matt suddenly unlocked the door and passed through the side entrance to the kitchen. Margaret's face relaxed, displaying relief at the interruption and giving her a chance to reorient the conversation.

  After kissing his wife, he looked over at his mother. “It's so good to see you both. It's been quite a day. Let me go change, and we can eat.” As he walked by fiddling with his jacket pocket, his fists pulled together in a compact ball.

  * * *

  After several days of playing Grandma, Olivia went for a drive to give some thought to what she'd seen at Margaret and Matt's house. She was certain Margaret would be revealing a pregnancy soon enough from everything she'd seen and heard. After about an hour, Olivia stopped at the playground near the corner of their house hoping to find Margaret and the girls, as she didn't have a key with her to enter their home.

  As she walked toward the playground area, Olivia noticed the girls jumping into the sandbox to play. Before she could get close enough, Olivia discovered that Margaret was not alone. Sarah had just approached from the opposite side. Olivia stood, partially hidden by the telephone pole, listening in to their conversation.

  “Thanks for meeting me. I reckon I needed to talk to someone who understood how to deal with that woman. Bless her heart,” Sarah said.

  Margaret hugged her. “Absolutely. I needed the break myself. The Queen is out for a drive. It's awful how suddenly Ben passed away, but she's worse than usual.”

  “Tell me about it. I'm still sore from her verbal lashings.” Sarah ripped open a bag of chips. “I'm craving salt today. Have one.”

  “You probably cried it all out from her visit. At least yours ended. She's still with me for a few more days. I'm not sure how long I'll survive without fighting back.”

  “I fought back this time. I've been so quiet over the years letting her attitude go without ever pushing back. I couldn't do it this time. She attacked me over some issue between Teddy and Ben.”

  Olivia glanced over at the girls observing Melanie protecting her younger sisters on the swing. She'd not inherited that watchful eye from her mother. If she had, Margaret would have known Olivia stood just a few feet away. Annoyed at her daughter-in-law's words, Olivia tried to understand their perspective.

  “But the girls love her. I guess she's just protecting her sons and grandkids,” Margaret said.

  “And we ain't worth a hill of beans? She has to cut us some slack.”

  “I know. Ben kept her in check all these years. I'm afraid for what's to come.”

  “We'll get through this together. I'm fixin' to find a way to butter her up.”

  “At least we have each other. Come on, let's go play with the girls. I wanna get a few pics of them all. It'll take our mind off Olivia. She's supposed to meet me at the house in a little bit.”

  Olivia reflected on the conversation she'd just overheard. Neither said anything too untrue, but their words were still hurtful. She'd been trying to be more open-minded, but it wasn't going to happen on her own. Everyone needed to give a little, especially Sarah who'd been the more troubling one at the moment.

  * * *

  A day later, Matt retrieved the drawings he'd received from the architect who had designed a first draft of the house expansion plans. He sat on the couch in the den near Olivia, fidgeting with the rubber band that held the schematics together. It snapped across the room narrowly missing his mother's face. As he unrolled them on the coffee table in front of her, Olivia noticed the architect's name in the lower right-hand corner.

  “Matthew, why didn't you ask your brother to design the extension? Caleb would have done them for you. Your father would have been so proud to watch you boys work together.”

  Matt looked up, curious how his father would interpret his recent parking lot actions. “I don't know. Caleb's not around, and we only met with the architect once. These are preliminary based on our first conversation. I might ask Caleb to eventually review them.”

  “You're adding four more bedrooms?” Olivia noticed the distracted look in his eyes as he scanned the room around them. “Matthew?”

  Matt's attention was stuck on his conversation with Ira Rattenbury earlier in the w
eek, frustrated it would be close to a month before the attorney settled his father's estate. When Olivia called his name, he re-focused. “What did you say?”

  Olivia noticed his brow appeared moist, and his eyes still darted back and forth. “I asked you about the bedrooms you're adding. Do you feel well, Matthew? Your complexion is a bit faint.”

  “I'm fine.” Matt's voice raised several octaves higher as he jumped up. “Just tired. Worried about the game tonight.”

  Olivia paused but couldn't wait any longer. “Matthew, is Margaret pregnant again?”

  Matt stopped pacing the living room and hurried toward his mother. “Did she tell you she was pregnant?” His chest squeezed all the breath from his lungs. His right hand twitched uncontrollably.

  Olivia stood pushing the drawings to the side, so she could pass by the table. “Matthew, you don't look well. Let me get you water.” She walked to the kitchen and filled a glass from the tap.

  Matt reached in his pocket and opened the bottle. He poured out two pills and swallowed them with the glass of water his mother handed him.

  “What are you taking, Matthew?” She reached for the bottle.

  He retracted his hand as though it held the solution to all life's problems, and he held the only elixir left on the planet. “Nothing, something to settle my stomach. It's been a little off lately.”

  “Give me the bottle, Matthew.”

  Matt sensed his entire body tense and shake. Could Margaret be pregnant again? We can't afford another baby right now. His heart rate sped up a few extra beats per second. He needed to relax. Matt slipped into a trance.

  Olivia took the opportunity to seize the bottle from his hands, noticing his rapid heartbeat and guiding him to the chair on her left. “You need to sit.”

  “Leave it, that's mine. Stop interfering.” Matt's words spilled from a sharp, venomous tongue. His hands tried unsuccessfully to grab hold of his only remaining cure. At the last second, when reaching for the bottle of pills, his open palm landed on Olivia's chin, smacking her backward into the sofa. He stared at her uncertain how he'd lost all control.

  “I'm so sorry, Mom. It was an accident. I didn't mean to hit you.” His rough voice pitched low as he hung his head in shame. Nothing but the fervent whistle of a train barreling on its tracks with no set course echoed somewhere in the distance. It soothed Matt as his body flushed hot and cold with a debilitating force he couldn't control.

  As Matt sank into the chair, his mother shrank back into the couch, cupping the side of her stinging and blotchy red face. After she caught her breath, Olivia searched the contents of the bottle. “Matthew, it's missing the prescription details. Where did you get it from?”

  Matt looked at his mother and then at the floor. He had lost control. He needed to talk to someone. “I don't know his name. I bought them off Craig's List. I met some kid in a parking lot. What does it matter to you?” He covered his face with his hands and bent forward over his lap. Dizziness plagued his head, and the nausea overwhelmed his remaining grasp on reality.

  Olivia sat back on the couch letting out a gasp as all energy escaped from her body. She dropped the bottle into her purse and rested a hand on her son's shoulder. “Matthew, I don't know what's going on here, but obviously you need to talk to someone. I'm here. Tell me what's going on.” Olivia's voice held a rigid tone as she attempted to regain control.

  * * *

  Olivia spent the next few days with her son trying to understand what happened to the boy who once appeared to have a perfect life. As she talked to him, she learned perception was part of the problem. Everyone else had looked in from the outside picturing a happy couple with a beautiful family, a well-kept home, plans to expand, a challenging but rewarding job, and years of future happiness blossoming as the days passed.

  No one had seen the buildup of paralyzing pressure over the last decade filling every cell of Matt's body until he became so tightly wound, the energy had nowhere to dissipate. Gaping fissures in his newly punctured body armor surfaced allowing any control he hoarded to escape his grasp. Instead of talking, he pushed the concerns deeper inside, but it only caused a ripple somewhere else. His body ticked like a furious time bomb, and no one had been tasked with defusing the sparking timer before he detonated.

  She agonized at the thought of losing him, believing the same ferocity had amassed control inside of her. By the end of the week, she'd learned her son had been alternating between anti-anxiety pills and various stimulants trying to maintain a balance, so no one would know what happened. She worried about the legal ramifications given the pills he took belonged to other people, not to mention he'd bought them off the internet.

  Olivia had known of Zachary's addiction to coke in the past, but Ben had handled that situation. He'd never told her the details though she knew her son was in a rehab facility for a few weeks, as the signs in the preceding months were evident. With Matthew, it was different as he didn't have a drug problem, at least it didn't appear so to her. He had an anxiety problem and used drugs to hide it. Olivia's lack of experience left her blind to handle the situation, but she assumed Ethan or Zach could offer proper advice.

  * * *

  Matt went for a walk reflecting on why he neglected to tell his mother about the financial issues with the law practice. He only explained he had trouble keeping up with personal expenses. While walking, his mind drifted back to the last conversation with his father about the firm's financial situation…

  “Dad, got a minute? I need to chat with you about an issue before the quarterly meeting with Ms. Davis and Mr. Wittleton,” Matt said.

  “For you, absolutely. But only a few minutes… I'm taking Teddy with me to the Goddard luncheon to show him how to handle tough clients.”

  “You guys are spending a lot of time together lately. Maybe I could join you at the next one, too?

  “Let me get Teddy set up to manage the firm at the end of the year, and then you and I can talk about your future, son.”

  “Okay. I'll wait on the sidelines a bit longer. About the meeting next week… we're gonna miss the forecast this quarter. We're down ten percent from prior year's earnings.”

  “Ten percent? We are pretty close. We'll make it up next quarter. Goddard will win big in this settlement.”

  “But next quarter's goals are even higher, Dad. We might be off our game a little this year. You've been working with Teddy more on…”

  “We'll be fine, Matt. Just pull together the numbers, and I'll look at them tomorrow. Then you can take them to Teddy for his input. I need to go. I'm sure you can handle this one.”

  “But Dad…”

  A bicycle crossing his path jolted Matt out of his memory as he stepped into the street.

  I really could have used your help right now, Dad. This team needs its coach. I miss you.

  * * *

  Matt and Olivia finished their conversation the next day. “Mom, please don't talk to Ethan. I can fix this. I will talk to Margaret about the changes we need to make. I don't want everyone to know what's going on. It's the last thing keeping me strong enough to handle the situation. I don't want everyone to cast me as the failure. Please let me do this my way.”

  Olivia hadn't seen her son beg this way before. Even as a child, he accepted when his parents told him no to any of his requests or wishes. He rarely asked for much, but he'd never been this desperate. He'd always been a rational and level-headed man.

  “Matthew, I don't know how to help you myself. Ethan will know what to do. We don't have to tell anyone else, but you can't hide this from Margaret. She needs to know what's going on. I know it in my soul she is pregnant again, but she hasn't told you yet. You're scared of losing the house, but you're planning to build an extension. You can't afford another baby, but you're paying a fortune to put the girls into the best schools. I can help you with money. I can help you with the house. I can't help you with stopping the pills and coping with anxiety. We need professionals.”

  * * *
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br />   Olivia arrived home in the evening with an immediate need to rest given each visit to her children delivered a powerful blow to any remaining strength she had left. She'd even doubted her skills as a mother, curious if the contents of Ben's letters served as punishment for her weaknesses and inability to recognize the deep splinters in her family's facade. A debilitating pain persisted when realizing her children's lives had fallen apart as much as her own. She flipped through tons of family photo albums searching for the moment when each son's path went off course. Some had been keeping secrets from her for years, yet she knew she held partial blame. As she flipped through the books, she noticed many of the pictures were missing uncertain if she'd lost or misplaced them.

  As she lay in bed, Olivia's mind wandered despite the exhaustion lurking on the surface and deep within her body. When Ben passed away, her world turned upside down leaving her to face the future on her own. She and Ben had pondered so many plans for their future after he retired from the practice. They'd planned an elaborate vacation to Italy that autumn where they'd bask in the Tuscan sun, sail along the blue Amalfi Coast, and immerse themselves in Italian culture, renaissance, and history. Experience La Dolce Vita, the beauty and sweetness of life while doing nothing. Now she would be figuring it out all on her own, not to mention solving the predicament Ben had put her in with his decision to switch her child with a stranger's baby all those years ago.

  Olivia had hoped that as she spent time with each of her sons she'd get a clearer picture of her future as well as figure out which one wasn't her child before the lawyer located Rowena Hector. She never expected to discover each boy veiled a secret just as Ben had. She felt confident placing her hopes in Ethan to find resolutions to the situations, especially Matthew's problem. Olivia located the phone and dialed Matthew's mobile number, desperate for assurance he'd improved since she left the day before.

  “Hi, Mom.” Matt stepped into the bathroom and shut the door.

  “Matthew, I'm calling to check on your progress.”